‘If I had only known…’

What do Jason Whitlock and Oswald Chambers have in common? Except for being mentioned in this column, you may think very little. But first, who are these two individuals?

Jason Whitlock is an African-American sportswriter, who previously worked for ESPN and FOX Sports. Whitlock is opinionated, and doesn’t always offer the conventional wisdom that seems to be so prevalent in the sports media these days.

Oswald Chambers was a Christian minister from the early 1900’s. Chambers taught and lectured at Bible colleges in England. During World War I, he became a chaplain to soldiers fighting in Egypt. While there, Oswald became sick and died suddenly from complications from an emergency appendectomy.

The world would have known little about Oswald Chambers, except for his wife, Gertrude. Gertrude was trained in shorthand, and took dictation of Oswald’s lectures and sermons. Gertrude would eventually take those sermons and lectures, put them in print, and create the classic devotional, “My Utmost for His Highest.” With millions in print, it has been considered one of the most significant Christian books of the 20th century, impacting thousands of lives.

So, what could Jason Whitlock and Oswald Chambers possibly have in common? How about a couple of quotes that might be helpful for the time we are living in today. One by Whitlock from a radio program a few years ago, and another from Chambers from his classic devotional.

A few years ago, a professional ballplayer had gotten into some domestic trouble. A video had surfaced of him disciplining his child. Personally, it reminded me of the way we were disciplined as children. It was an old fashioned spanking. But the media was outraged by it, and it became a topic on the radio.

Jason Whitlock was commenting on the situation. Whitlock did not appear as outraged as some of the other media folks. I got the feeling that, like me, he may had some old fashioned spanking growing up. But he made sure to point out the difference between spanking a child and beating a child.

But the culture has changed. Whitlock went on to emphasize that maybe the way the ballplayer was disciplined as a child had a bearing on how he now disciplined his own child. Then he added, “A reason is not an excuse, but it is a reason.”

I was reminded of Whitlock’s quote while reading my “Utmost” devotional from a few months ago. In it, Chambers states, “Stop having a measuring stick for other people. There is always at least one more fact, which we know nothing about, in every person’s situation.”

We are quick to judge others. But there may be a reason for actions that we may not know or understand. It may not excuse the behavior, bad behavior is bad behavior, but it may help explain it.

Then, there may be that one fact that we don’t know about in a situation. I dealt with many people in my work for over thirty years. I would often get frustrated and would wonder why they would do what they did. Often, it was just plain old being sorry. But sometimes there was more to their story than I knew at the time. And once I found out it changed my attitude toward the situation. How many times have we jumped to conclusions, said or did something, and later have to say, “If I had only known…”

We need to know. We may need to know the reason and that one more fact. It may change our attitude and our response. But that may take time, a willingness to learn, and maybe change, if necessary. But it’s better than having to end up saying, “If I had only known…”