Taking on the Summit Plummet

Blizzard Beach!

To some, it may sound like an oxymoron; but to others, including myself, it was a totally awesome water park in the heart of Orlando, Florida, owned by Walt Disney World.

We were on a family vacation — my parents, their four kids, one daughter-in-law, one son-in-law and four grandchildren — to the Sunshine State in June 2003.

The wet spot had many cool and exciting things to do, but the hottest attraction was undoubtedly the Summit Plummet, known for being the fastest and tallest water slide on the planet.

I have been to numerous water theme parks across the country and ridden down many “thrill seeker” water slides, but all of them paled in comparison to this, the King Kong of all water slides.

After climbing the spiraling tower leading to the death defying water slide, it definitely seemed like I was on top of the Empire State Building.

Epcot Center and the Magic Kingdom, along with many other things, including the resort where we were staying, could be seen from what is most likely the highest elevation in the Sunshine State.

I decided to give the most popular ride in the park a whirl along with my brother John and his two daughters Nicole and Rachel. In order to take the plunge over what looked like Niagara Falls, we were required to hop aboard a ski lift and travel over much of the park to the top of Mount Gushmore, a man-made mountain with an elevation of ninety feet.

Inclement weather had been threatening to cut our excursion short to the water country throughout much of the day; but just as we began to climb the winding tower, the rain came down in torrents.

I would have been glad for the shelter of the tall structure, but the rain was coming down at an angle. Not that it mattered, we were already wet; but the rain was cold and the wind that came with it made me shiver.

My nieces began to whine because they were cold. Rachel also had another problem as we were waiting in what seemed like an endless line of other thrill seekers – she had to go to the potty.

When my brother John wasn’t looking. I advised her to let the flood gates open. No one would ever know since we were already dripping wet. Well, that was the wrong thing to say because my brother had a conniption fit when Rachel blurted out what I instructed her to do.

I guess I know now who can’t be trusted to keep a secret.

But did you know, as we neared the top of that tower and Rachel’s bladder was screaming for relief, my prim and proper brother told his daughter to let nature take its course as she went down the water slide.

Now that didn’t sit very well with me considering that she was going down the slide before me.

A few minutes later, a dreaded announcement came over the public address system.

The National Weather Service was calling for severe thunderstorms to hit the area within the next forty-five minutes to an hour. They are going to be forced to shut down the water park.

I was not a happy camper, let me tell you.

“There is no way I’m walking back down all these steps,” I thought to myself. “The only way I’m going down this mountain is over the edge of the water slide.”

I couldn’t believe the trail of people, including tough talking teenage boys, in front of us that gave up their position in line and descended the tower losing their only opportunity to ride the biggest, baddest water slide of all time.

I don’t care how much it was raining, I was not about to give up my spot in line after waiting forty-five minutes. I was going down that water slide one way or another.

We finally made it to the top, and my goal was in sight.

After watching my two nieces and brother go down, I was confident I would survive the nearly ninety degree-angled drop through a tunnel traveling at a rate of 30 mph to the bottom well over one hundred and twenty feet below.

When I got into the tube to make my descent, the force of the water pushed me closer to the edge of the of the man-made waterfall.

There was a metal bar across the slide. You weren’t supposed to make your descent until the operator lifted it. The teenybopper refused to lift the bar until the area below was cleared. I was beginning to lose my grip and was unable to hold on much longer. I was going down that water slide whether she wanted me to or not.

Knocking myself out with the metal bar before taking the plunge might have been the better alternative in the end. It would have spared me the horrors of watching my life pass before my eyes as I plummeted to uncertain doom. I screamed so loudly on the way down, I think everyone in the entire park heard me. My whole family laughed as I made a poor attempt, at best, to climb from the trough and stumble toward them.

The Summit Plummet definitely lived up to its name, not to mention leaving me with a lasting impression as I pulled my swimming trunks out of my derriere.